Walking to daycare with Ada this week was entertaining to say the least.
On Tuesday, we saw one of Rick's co-workers walking with her grandchildren. The kids were holding their arms out at their sides when they crossed the street as if they were crossing guards. Ada's been in that phase where she copies everyone these days so she of course held her arms out to the side all the way down the sidewalk, but not at the intersection.
On Wednesday, we were only a block from home holding hands while walking when I felt a downward pull on my arm. Ada was leaning over to pick something up. We were approaching a crosswalk so my mind was on finding a gap in the cars and by the time I looked down to see what she was doing, she already had her thumb and forefinger in position to pick up a large dog turd. She definitely touched it and gave me quite the confused look when I scolded her for reaching for it. It must have looked like a chocolate candy bar. Needless to say, I didn't let her touch anything until we arrived at daycare. Upon our arrival, I asked her caregivers to scrub her hands thoroughly.
On Thursday, she again surprised me. It was a ninety-degree day with humidity that made it more than just hot. Ada spent the morning's walk saying "Hot" and trying to walk in the shadows. If there wasn't a shadow, she walked directly behind me, using my shadow to keep her cool. Her walking behind me wasn't conducive to me watching her as we crossed the street or walked down the sidewalk. That was a day I really needed eyes in the back of my head.
With each new day, something new is always learned. This past week it just happened to be my turn to do the learning. When we cross the street, I'll let Ada hold her hands up like a crossing guard to protect us. When we are walking anywhere, I'll be on high-alert for the presence of dog poop. And when it is hot out, I will give her an umbrella to create her own shade so she doesn't use my shadow.
Moral of the story: Kids aren't always the students in your relationship. They will often teach you new things, many of which you'll wish you never knew.
Showing posts with label Day Care. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Day Care. Show all posts
Saturday, August 14, 2010
Thursday, April 29, 2010
Day Care Drama – Good Cop, Bad Cop?
Ada seems to still be doing well at day care. Now that she isn’t crying every time we drop her off, we’ve noticed that she has picked favorites from her staff of care providers. Monica is her clear choice as Ada lights up, jumps from her stroller and runs toward her in the morning for the biggest of hugs. That makes me feel great. That isn’t something a two-year-old can fake either.
On the other hand when anyone else answers the door, Ada isn’t nearly as excited. She either quietly follows me into the building or cries the whole way if she sees her other care givers. When I asked Monica if it was a good cop, bad cop routine she just said they have different styles and the other care giver is more old school and strict. I’m a bit surprised to see that they don’t have similar styles of discipline across the board at the day care. Obviously there are many styles that work and some kids respond better to various techniques. Since Monica is headed for vacation next week, I think Rick and I need to politely pose the question of how their styles differ, how they think Ada is adjusting, and see what we can do to get Ada to like both “cops”. I’m not excited that she appears to fear or avoid one of her primary care givers. It is comforting to know she really likes the other one, but I’d be happier if we can balance that out a bit more. We’ll see how it goes.
Moral of the story: Day care is never a “set it and forget it” situation. Constant surveillance and monitoring of your child’s situation is a must and never easy.
On the other hand when anyone else answers the door, Ada isn’t nearly as excited. She either quietly follows me into the building or cries the whole way if she sees her other care givers. When I asked Monica if it was a good cop, bad cop routine she just said they have different styles and the other care giver is more old school and strict. I’m a bit surprised to see that they don’t have similar styles of discipline across the board at the day care. Obviously there are many styles that work and some kids respond better to various techniques. Since Monica is headed for vacation next week, I think Rick and I need to politely pose the question of how their styles differ, how they think Ada is adjusting, and see what we can do to get Ada to like both “cops”. I’m not excited that she appears to fear or avoid one of her primary care givers. It is comforting to know she really likes the other one, but I’d be happier if we can balance that out a bit more. We’ll see how it goes.
Moral of the story: Day care is never a “set it and forget it” situation. Constant surveillance and monitoring of your child’s situation is a must and never easy.
Friday, April 2, 2010
The Day Care Update
Five weeks in and we are getting encouraging reports from Ada's new day care.
The Good:
She's fitting in. She gets along well and participates in all of the activities.
She behaves well, isn't using her high-pitched squealing voice anymore, except on the indoor play area where they think she gets a little overwhelmed and excited.
She's a good eater.
It seems like drop offs and pick-ups are a bit less dramatic. Still the occasional screaming fit and the "Mommy/Daddy don't go", but we are seeing improvement.
The Bad:
She isn't really napping for very long. Maybe thirty minutes, maybe more or less depending on the day.
Her use of a big girl cup instead of a sippy cup is improving, but could be better. Same with her fork and spoon.
Somehow, she keeps blowing out her diapers during nap time. I don't understand how this is even possible since she only naps for a few minutes, but she's coming home in backup pants more frequently.
In my quest to learn more about how she is acting at day care and if they are having the same issues with diaper changes and overall whineyness that I'm having at home, I wrote a little note hoping they could answer some of my concerns. Ms. Monica, her main caretaker, took time to write back in detail and was very encouraging. Her biggest concern is the whole napping thing, or resistance to napping to be more precise. I'm trying to come up with new solutions and tricks we can try to remedy that little issue so we'll see how it goes.
I'm also trying to figure out how to change her or clean her up before I take her home for the night. Thursday, when I picked her up, I got her outside just as I realized she had a poopy diaper. Since I'm five blocks from home and coming straight from work, I never have diapers or wipes on me. I'm thinking I'll try two things. One, always check her diaper before we leave the building and ask to change it if needed. And two, putting a small bag of wipes and a few backup diapers in her bag in case we run an errand straight from day care and need to make a change along the way. I'm also going to have to just accept the fact that I should always have a small container of wipes in my purse for all of their many uses. They really do come in handy.
Moral of the story: Transitioning into a day care routine isn't easy, but can be made easier through good communication and being on the same page.
The Good:
She's fitting in. She gets along well and participates in all of the activities.
She behaves well, isn't using her high-pitched squealing voice anymore, except on the indoor play area where they think she gets a little overwhelmed and excited.
She's a good eater.
It seems like drop offs and pick-ups are a bit less dramatic. Still the occasional screaming fit and the "Mommy/Daddy don't go", but we are seeing improvement.
The Bad:
She isn't really napping for very long. Maybe thirty minutes, maybe more or less depending on the day.
Her use of a big girl cup instead of a sippy cup is improving, but could be better. Same with her fork and spoon.
Somehow, she keeps blowing out her diapers during nap time. I don't understand how this is even possible since she only naps for a few minutes, but she's coming home in backup pants more frequently.
In my quest to learn more about how she is acting at day care and if they are having the same issues with diaper changes and overall whineyness that I'm having at home, I wrote a little note hoping they could answer some of my concerns. Ms. Monica, her main caretaker, took time to write back in detail and was very encouraging. Her biggest concern is the whole napping thing, or resistance to napping to be more precise. I'm trying to come up with new solutions and tricks we can try to remedy that little issue so we'll see how it goes.
I'm also trying to figure out how to change her or clean her up before I take her home for the night. Thursday, when I picked her up, I got her outside just as I realized she had a poopy diaper. Since I'm five blocks from home and coming straight from work, I never have diapers or wipes on me. I'm thinking I'll try two things. One, always check her diaper before we leave the building and ask to change it if needed. And two, putting a small bag of wipes and a few backup diapers in her bag in case we run an errand straight from day care and need to make a change along the way. I'm also going to have to just accept the fact that I should always have a small container of wipes in my purse for all of their many uses. They really do come in handy.
Moral of the story: Transitioning into a day care routine isn't easy, but can be made easier through good communication and being on the same page.
Monday, March 15, 2010
The Longest Week Ever
Ada survived day care week two.
I almost killed Rick on Wednesday though...
You see, Rick dropped Ada off at day care in the car since he was driving to a client meeting, and he forgot that I'd be walking Ada home so he didn't leave a stroller at day care for me to do so. I easily could have made the same mistake so I wasn't so much mad at Rick but at the fact that it is six blocks between our house and day care and at the end of the day there is no energy left in Ada's little body to make the trek home on her own. At five months pregnant, with her being 35 pounds and me having herniated discs in my neck, carrying her is NOT an option. I've never wanted to hire a stranger to carry her home so badly in my life (or hers).
In an effort to break up the walk, I decided to take her three blocks to dinner and then four blocks home. That might have worked well but... the ladies at daycare didn't notice her bag on her hook at nap time (her hook changed at some point this week so there was some confusion) which contained our new strategy to encourage Ada to take naps. The bag held not one, but two secret weapons: her bug blanket and her stuffed piggy. Without these comfort measures on her cot, there was no way she was going to nap.
Result: I picked up a cranky, unrested, hungry, exhausted child, with no stroller, six blocks from home.
We started toward the restaurant and encountered a series of fits. She hollered and cried as I tried to sing and encourage her. She'd cut me off and say "up, up" with outstretched arms. I'd crouch down to her level to explain yet again how I can't carry her and it was just a little further. People were staring, their eyes burning me with feelings of judgement as my daughter goes screaming down the sidewalk as I pull her along. After two blocks, I potato sack her over my shoulder hoping that is a low stress way to carry her since putting her on my hip only works for about four or five steps and makes we worry about hurting the baby in the belly. I made it about twenty steps to the corner and put her back down to be distracted by the sliding doors at Walgreens. We eventually made it to the restaurant, ordered dinner, and went to the bathroom to wash up. She cried while I ordered and paid and a nice employee tried to entertain her with a page of stickers and paper but she wasn't having it. She was too crabby by that point and there was no turning back. Once at the table I went to get water and get settled into a booth. Somehow, over a distance of about eight feet, Ada managed to clobber her jaw against the corner of a table and got a bruise on her jawline, causing even more of a scene as she cried from real pain. She was fine during dinner, but the walk home was pretty bad. Again, I had random people stopping to tell her not to cry. She threw a good size tantrum on the sidewalk at one point. And finally I found a trick that worked and motivated her. A new game I call "Do you see a puppy? Let's go find a puppy!" She still broke down every half block since the dogs out being walked were all hiding within a block of our house but it finally paid off once we got to that block and she got to pet four dogs within 100 feet. And I got to commiserate with parents strolling down the street with two infants hoping their children wouldn't throw street tantrums like Ada. I just looked at them and said "Naps are your friend, and strollers are a must."
Moral of the story: ALWAYS have a stroller, or someone--preferably that you know-- who can carry your child a decent distance, with you at all times. Consider keeping an umbrella stroller in the trunk of the car for bad parking days too.
I almost killed Rick on Wednesday though...
You see, Rick dropped Ada off at day care in the car since he was driving to a client meeting, and he forgot that I'd be walking Ada home so he didn't leave a stroller at day care for me to do so. I easily could have made the same mistake so I wasn't so much mad at Rick but at the fact that it is six blocks between our house and day care and at the end of the day there is no energy left in Ada's little body to make the trek home on her own. At five months pregnant, with her being 35 pounds and me having herniated discs in my neck, carrying her is NOT an option. I've never wanted to hire a stranger to carry her home so badly in my life (or hers).
In an effort to break up the walk, I decided to take her three blocks to dinner and then four blocks home. That might have worked well but... the ladies at daycare didn't notice her bag on her hook at nap time (her hook changed at some point this week so there was some confusion) which contained our new strategy to encourage Ada to take naps. The bag held not one, but two secret weapons: her bug blanket and her stuffed piggy. Without these comfort measures on her cot, there was no way she was going to nap.
Result: I picked up a cranky, unrested, hungry, exhausted child, with no stroller, six blocks from home.
We started toward the restaurant and encountered a series of fits. She hollered and cried as I tried to sing and encourage her. She'd cut me off and say "up, up" with outstretched arms. I'd crouch down to her level to explain yet again how I can't carry her and it was just a little further. People were staring, their eyes burning me with feelings of judgement as my daughter goes screaming down the sidewalk as I pull her along. After two blocks, I potato sack her over my shoulder hoping that is a low stress way to carry her since putting her on my hip only works for about four or five steps and makes we worry about hurting the baby in the belly. I made it about twenty steps to the corner and put her back down to be distracted by the sliding doors at Walgreens. We eventually made it to the restaurant, ordered dinner, and went to the bathroom to wash up. She cried while I ordered and paid and a nice employee tried to entertain her with a page of stickers and paper but she wasn't having it. She was too crabby by that point and there was no turning back. Once at the table I went to get water and get settled into a booth. Somehow, over a distance of about eight feet, Ada managed to clobber her jaw against the corner of a table and got a bruise on her jawline, causing even more of a scene as she cried from real pain. She was fine during dinner, but the walk home was pretty bad. Again, I had random people stopping to tell her not to cry. She threw a good size tantrum on the sidewalk at one point. And finally I found a trick that worked and motivated her. A new game I call "Do you see a puppy? Let's go find a puppy!" She still broke down every half block since the dogs out being walked were all hiding within a block of our house but it finally paid off once we got to that block and she got to pet four dogs within 100 feet. And I got to commiserate with parents strolling down the street with two infants hoping their children wouldn't throw street tantrums like Ada. I just looked at them and said "Naps are your friend, and strollers are a must."
Moral of the story: ALWAYS have a stroller, or someone--preferably that you know-- who can carry your child a decent distance, with you at all times. Consider keeping an umbrella stroller in the trunk of the car for bad parking days too.
Thursday, March 4, 2010
Day 2 and 3 - Not so hot
We were off to such a good start, and then it was time to go back to Ada's new day care.
Day 1 went off beautifully. No complaints and a happy, smiley kid greeted me at the end of the day.
Day 2 on the other hand, started with the most awful "No Mom, don't leave me!" face I have ever seen. She screamed and grasped for me while in the arms of her new care givers. She might as well have just ripped out my heart and stomped on it. Ouch.
I thought I'd find a happy child waiting for me at the end of the day... but no. She ran to me and then started crying and wanting to be held in the "How could you abandon me all day? Don't ever leave me again." way.
Which makes it utterly unsurprising that she woke up screaming for us three times last night, first insisting that Daddy watch a movie on the couch with her at 11pm, and then only settling down when Rick tossed her into our bed after her other two wailing episodes. The second shocked me the most as she scurried across the bed and forced her way between me and my body pillow to get as close as she possibly could to me. She's a daddy's girl 100% so this was a huge shocker.
For Day 3, I made Rick drop her off. She did the whole miserable screaming thing again as he dropped her off, got her settled and signed her in. And when my turn came to pick her up at the end of the day, her little face twisted into a cry as she raced toward me, and then quickly became the look of relief as she realized that I'd come to save her. She then did a happy dance, said goodbye to her new friends and bee-lined for her coat.
The staff reported that she did well for her first week. She is eating well, participates in circle time and pretends to sing along even if she doesn't know the words to the songs yet. But she isn't napping well. We're thinking that next week we'll try taking her stuffed animal piggy or kitty with her to see if that helps give her a sense of belonging. Poor Ada.
I've also never seen her so excited to hop into her stroller for the ride to and from day care. She'll sit in it at the top of the stairs before we have a chance to even get out of the house. Either she is that tired, or just realized she could have been riding in the stroller to Will's all these months if she'd only played her cards right.
A tough three days, but it could have been much worse. Next week, we'll try a new strategy with the help of some stuffed animal friends. I'll try to add in a few play dates with her standard cast of neighborhood tots, and we'll just have to see how it goes. Kids are resilient and I think we just have to be supportive, give her a little extra love in the coming weeks, and see how it all shakes out. Hopefully, she'll be eager to go to day care in three weeks time. But maybe it will take four weeks since the 14th is daylight savings time and that just messes everything up.
Moral of the story: Change unsettles everyone no matter how much you prepare. You just have to do your best to adjust and be supportive of one another.
Day 1 went off beautifully. No complaints and a happy, smiley kid greeted me at the end of the day.
Day 2 on the other hand, started with the most awful "No Mom, don't leave me!" face I have ever seen. She screamed and grasped for me while in the arms of her new care givers. She might as well have just ripped out my heart and stomped on it. Ouch.
I thought I'd find a happy child waiting for me at the end of the day... but no. She ran to me and then started crying and wanting to be held in the "How could you abandon me all day? Don't ever leave me again." way.
Which makes it utterly unsurprising that she woke up screaming for us three times last night, first insisting that Daddy watch a movie on the couch with her at 11pm, and then only settling down when Rick tossed her into our bed after her other two wailing episodes. The second shocked me the most as she scurried across the bed and forced her way between me and my body pillow to get as close as she possibly could to me. She's a daddy's girl 100% so this was a huge shocker.
For Day 3, I made Rick drop her off. She did the whole miserable screaming thing again as he dropped her off, got her settled and signed her in. And when my turn came to pick her up at the end of the day, her little face twisted into a cry as she raced toward me, and then quickly became the look of relief as she realized that I'd come to save her. She then did a happy dance, said goodbye to her new friends and bee-lined for her coat.
The staff reported that she did well for her first week. She is eating well, participates in circle time and pretends to sing along even if she doesn't know the words to the songs yet. But she isn't napping well. We're thinking that next week we'll try taking her stuffed animal piggy or kitty with her to see if that helps give her a sense of belonging. Poor Ada.
I've also never seen her so excited to hop into her stroller for the ride to and from day care. She'll sit in it at the top of the stairs before we have a chance to even get out of the house. Either she is that tired, or just realized she could have been riding in the stroller to Will's all these months if she'd only played her cards right.
A tough three days, but it could have been much worse. Next week, we'll try a new strategy with the help of some stuffed animal friends. I'll try to add in a few play dates with her standard cast of neighborhood tots, and we'll just have to see how it goes. Kids are resilient and I think we just have to be supportive, give her a little extra love in the coming weeks, and see how it all shakes out. Hopefully, she'll be eager to go to day care in three weeks time. But maybe it will take four weeks since the 14th is daylight savings time and that just messes everything up.
Moral of the story: Change unsettles everyone no matter how much you prepare. You just have to do your best to adjust and be supportive of one another.
Tuesday, March 2, 2010
Day Care Day 1 = Success!
Whew!
What a load off. Ada started day care today and the transition could not have been smoother. I've been a little nervous since she really liked being with Will and Alison these past few months. And I'll admit that, even though I mentioned to Rick that we should take the umbrella stroller, I still forgot and the walk is 2 blocks father than she is used to. Luckily we were able to distract her with puppy dogs and a round of the ABCs.
Once we arrived at the daycare, Ada was ready to start her day and absorb all of the new experiences. We were there maybe five minutes, likely less, when she ran off to play and left us to do our thing. We had enough time to take off her coat, hang it up, sign her in, see her new classroom, and walk her into the morning gathering room. That's when she ran toward the other kids and Rick and I decided it was best to just let her play instead of doing a long drawn out goodbye. Then we left. On the sidewalk, I almost teared up, but then I reminded myself that I was just so darn happy that she seemed happy and this might work out after all. AHHH!
Then I walked to the corner and thought I was going to miss the bus that would take me to the el but as it turns out, the stop is about half a block from the corner and there was a long line of people waiting to board the bus. Yeah! A quick kiss to Rick and off on our separate ways we go.
I admit that I thought about her at 2 and hoped she was taking a nap and ate her lunch. And that was it. I really didn't worry about her because she is so outgoing that she really thrives in that environment. When I went to pick her up, she was in the back with the "leftover" kids as I call them -- they consolidate the rooms after 5pm once the parents start to pick them up and the numbers dwindle. I headed back to see her and got a glowing review from the staff. They were very impressed that she joined in the circle for story time and acted like she's been there all along. They noted how surprised they were that she knew how to say "No, no, no," and wag her finger when "the Dr. says, 'No more monkeys jumping on the bed!". And she participated during the itsy bitsy spider too. I wonder where she gets her extroverted nature? Couldn't possibly be from me...
And the biggest shocker was that they were able to get her hair up into a half ponytail. Amazing. She will barely let me touch her hair let alone put it up for her. I got it into a full ponytail this morning but she was not happy about it and let me know it.
So the day was a great success. Yippee!
The walk home on the other hand... let's just say it was slow going, she looked like she was drunk at times the way she staggered and stumbled (I think she's exhausted from having too much fun all day) and, I ended up having to carry her two blocks when I ran out of milestones for her to walk to (like dogs being walked up ahead, kitties in store windows, etc.). She gave up completely when the electronics store down the street had Finding Nemo playing on the plasma screen. Insta-zombie. And then she saw kids with balloons coming out of the playgroup next to our house and just lost it. Ba-loo, Ba-loo. We walked over to see the balloons but they were all tangled and the mom couldn't stop to give her one since it was cold out and she was trying to get her 2 and 4-year-olds to the car after a birthday party. I didn't blame her at all. And once we got inside, Ada was just fine -- after she ate her second full banana of the day that is. And you won't be shocked to know that I quickly popped in cartoons for her to unwind after a long day. She'll get used to it and then her days with me are going to be so boring.
Moral of the story: You just have to go with the flow of things. Try to make transitions as easy as possible. Talk to your child beforehand to let them know what's going on and hope for the best.
What a load off. Ada started day care today and the transition could not have been smoother. I've been a little nervous since she really liked being with Will and Alison these past few months. And I'll admit that, even though I mentioned to Rick that we should take the umbrella stroller, I still forgot and the walk is 2 blocks father than she is used to. Luckily we were able to distract her with puppy dogs and a round of the ABCs.
Once we arrived at the daycare, Ada was ready to start her day and absorb all of the new experiences. We were there maybe five minutes, likely less, when she ran off to play and left us to do our thing. We had enough time to take off her coat, hang it up, sign her in, see her new classroom, and walk her into the morning gathering room. That's when she ran toward the other kids and Rick and I decided it was best to just let her play instead of doing a long drawn out goodbye. Then we left. On the sidewalk, I almost teared up, but then I reminded myself that I was just so darn happy that she seemed happy and this might work out after all. AHHH!
Then I walked to the corner and thought I was going to miss the bus that would take me to the el but as it turns out, the stop is about half a block from the corner and there was a long line of people waiting to board the bus. Yeah! A quick kiss to Rick and off on our separate ways we go.
I admit that I thought about her at 2 and hoped she was taking a nap and ate her lunch. And that was it. I really didn't worry about her because she is so outgoing that she really thrives in that environment. When I went to pick her up, she was in the back with the "leftover" kids as I call them -- they consolidate the rooms after 5pm once the parents start to pick them up and the numbers dwindle. I headed back to see her and got a glowing review from the staff. They were very impressed that she joined in the circle for story time and acted like she's been there all along. They noted how surprised they were that she knew how to say "No, no, no," and wag her finger when "the Dr. says, 'No more monkeys jumping on the bed!". And she participated during the itsy bitsy spider too. I wonder where she gets her extroverted nature? Couldn't possibly be from me...
And the biggest shocker was that they were able to get her hair up into a half ponytail. Amazing. She will barely let me touch her hair let alone put it up for her. I got it into a full ponytail this morning but she was not happy about it and let me know it.
So the day was a great success. Yippee!
The walk home on the other hand... let's just say it was slow going, she looked like she was drunk at times the way she staggered and stumbled (I think she's exhausted from having too much fun all day) and, I ended up having to carry her two blocks when I ran out of milestones for her to walk to (like dogs being walked up ahead, kitties in store windows, etc.). She gave up completely when the electronics store down the street had Finding Nemo playing on the plasma screen. Insta-zombie. And then she saw kids with balloons coming out of the playgroup next to our house and just lost it. Ba-loo, Ba-loo. We walked over to see the balloons but they were all tangled and the mom couldn't stop to give her one since it was cold out and she was trying to get her 2 and 4-year-olds to the car after a birthday party. I didn't blame her at all. And once we got inside, Ada was just fine -- after she ate her second full banana of the day that is. And you won't be shocked to know that I quickly popped in cartoons for her to unwind after a long day. She'll get used to it and then her days with me are going to be so boring.
Moral of the story: You just have to go with the flow of things. Try to make transitions as easy as possible. Talk to your child beforehand to let them know what's going on and hope for the best.
Friday, October 23, 2009
Our Cute Commute
Ada and I walk down to Alison's house three days a week. It's only two blocks away and I don't take a stroller because I'm doing my best to keep Ada independent and make things easier for Alison. And I'm trying to teach Ada how to walk longer distances without being picked up and held since my back just can't take carrying her for long periods of time (she is over 30 pounds) and I abhor dragging a stroller everywhere we go.
On our commute to Alison and Will's place, we only travel down one street so we either take the east or west side, depending on if the streetlight is in our favor or not. Typically, I forget to text Alison that we are on our way and I have to do a bunch of fumbling through my purse and pockets to locate my phone and send a quick "OMW" ('on my way' for you non-texters) so she can come down to meet us at the door. While I'm busy trying to do all of that, Ada is actively running down the street and saying "Hi" to everyone we meet. It's really kind of cute. It's not as cute when she tries running across the street while the light is still red or gets too close to the road while I'm trying to text and box her out of the street with my thighs. But we manage.
On the way home is when things get fun. She's so excited to get outside and run home and, maybe it's because she is a bit more awake, she just wants to go, go, go. We almost always walk home on the east side of the street so she can stop to say "Hi" to all of her friends. One day Rick joined us and was confused when I told him we couldn't cross the street. You see, Ada has a routine...
First we wave at the kitty statue that waves at us from the window of the nail salon. Then we stop to poke at the flowers in front of the florist. Then we pause at the street to hold Mom's hand as we cross, ideally. Then we dance in front of the pizza place and the CD store since they tend to have speakers projecting music onto the street. Then we pause again at the alley. Then on to the flower box in front of the gift shop where she, occasionally, sticks her finger in the dirt or touches the plants. We come upon another waving kitty at another nail salon at that point. Maybe she'll check out the golden man statue at the bread, wine, and cheese store. Then she's on to find the duck in the window of the shoe store. And finally we arrive at the corner with the streetlight where we do a red light dance until mommy gets dizzy or the light turns in our favor.
As we cross the street, I often think Ada is planning how she can escape my grip and zip past our front steps so she can extend our walk. Depending on the weather, and how much stuff I'm carrying back from work, and how loaded up with toys and crafts her bag has become, she might get me to walk around the block. On days when she is just feeling a bit funky, she has been known to throw a tantrum on the threshold of the front vestibule door, but that's rare. Some days she ends our commute with a quick climb to the top of the stairs and others she turns it into a tug-of-war wherein I typically give up and either carry her or dump the stuff in the house and return to bring her in from the vestibule.
Moral of the story: Kids thrive on routine and consistency. Add a little fun into that and the days just keep getting better.
On our commute to Alison and Will's place, we only travel down one street so we either take the east or west side, depending on if the streetlight is in our favor or not. Typically, I forget to text Alison that we are on our way and I have to do a bunch of fumbling through my purse and pockets to locate my phone and send a quick "OMW" ('on my way' for you non-texters) so she can come down to meet us at the door. While I'm busy trying to do all of that, Ada is actively running down the street and saying "Hi" to everyone we meet. It's really kind of cute. It's not as cute when she tries running across the street while the light is still red or gets too close to the road while I'm trying to text and box her out of the street with my thighs. But we manage.
On the way home is when things get fun. She's so excited to get outside and run home and, maybe it's because she is a bit more awake, she just wants to go, go, go. We almost always walk home on the east side of the street so she can stop to say "Hi" to all of her friends. One day Rick joined us and was confused when I told him we couldn't cross the street. You see, Ada has a routine...
First we wave at the kitty statue that waves at us from the window of the nail salon. Then we stop to poke at the flowers in front of the florist. Then we pause at the street to hold Mom's hand as we cross, ideally. Then we dance in front of the pizza place and the CD store since they tend to have speakers projecting music onto the street. Then we pause again at the alley. Then on to the flower box in front of the gift shop where she, occasionally, sticks her finger in the dirt or touches the plants. We come upon another waving kitty at another nail salon at that point. Maybe she'll check out the golden man statue at the bread, wine, and cheese store. Then she's on to find the duck in the window of the shoe store. And finally we arrive at the corner with the streetlight where we do a red light dance until mommy gets dizzy or the light turns in our favor.
As we cross the street, I often think Ada is planning how she can escape my grip and zip past our front steps so she can extend our walk. Depending on the weather, and how much stuff I'm carrying back from work, and how loaded up with toys and crafts her bag has become, she might get me to walk around the block. On days when she is just feeling a bit funky, she has been known to throw a tantrum on the threshold of the front vestibule door, but that's rare. Some days she ends our commute with a quick climb to the top of the stairs and others she turns it into a tug-of-war wherein I typically give up and either carry her or dump the stuff in the house and return to bring her in from the vestibule.
Moral of the story: Kids thrive on routine and consistency. Add a little fun into that and the days just keep getting better.
Sunday, October 18, 2009
To Preschool, or not to Preschool?
Will this topic ever end? There is a small part of me that envies stay-at-home moms right now since they don't have to deal with hiring nannies, finding family members to cover for the nannies when they are sick or otherwise occupied, dropping their kids off at daycare every morning, getting them ready and out the door to go somewhere to be watched for the day....etc...etc... (The majority of me is thankful to have a part-time job that helps me maintain my own identity and balance in life.)
This issue got stirred up the other day when my neighborhood mom friend Sara came over with her son Aaron for a mini half-hour playdate. She's on sabbatical from work for 6 weeks and needs to figure out what to do with Aaron now that her husband switched jobs and doesn't work from home anymore. This translates into them needing coverage for 45 hours instead of 25 or 30 since he could be more flexible, which kind of prices them out of the market for a nanny. She started researching Preschools to see what options she has.
Aaron, like Ada, is almost 2 now which seems to complicate things a bit more. I never really gave thought to the issue of the cost of child care for an infant versus a toddler. Sara enlightened me that it is WAY cheaper to have child care for a toddler since they are easier to take care of and a facility can handle more toddlers per adult. For an infant, it's expensive and a nanny can be a comparable option. Having family down the street or friends that are willing to volunteer their time is another awesome option. Who knew that taking care of a child can strangle a family's finances?
Whenever I bring up how much I've paid nannies in the past or for Ada's stint in daycare, my friend in Iowa, who runs a home daycare, is so shocked that she offers to drive three hours to my house everyday to take care of Ada. Turns out that I've paid three or four times what she charges in her small town. That's the cost of living adjustment when you are in the city I guess. Maybe it's just our part of town and the daycares know they can get the wealthy folks to pony up the big bucks. I don't consider myself "wealthy folk" and am therefore, constantly re-evaluating our options.
Since Sara stopped by and started this conversation, I got all jittery again because, as always happens, my friend who is watching Ada for us now, is pregnant and due early March. She already has a 2-year-old little boy and we have to discuss options going forward now that she'll have an infant on her hands too. If she is willing to keep watching Ada, that's great... but is that the best thing for Ada and for our family budget? And what happens when we have another child? Then what the heck do we do? I don't want to pay for a nanny and a preschool as that would really break the momma's piggy bank. Oh the stress involved is just so overwhelming sometimes. I can't emphasize enough how thankful I am to a friend that told me from the beginning, "Just try to worry about childcare six months at a time. Beyond that, you have no control and need to keep your options open." It's some of the best, and most honest, advice I've received.
Then there is the whole issue of preschool. As far as I can tell, there are preschools that are also daycares and the words are interchangeable. And the Chicago Public School system has preschools available to four-year-olds, and three-year-olds get put on an waiting list to be admitted if they have room. Those are only while the school year is in session I think. And they are still a paid program, but maybe at a reduced level? Clearly I have a ton of research to do on all of this stuff.
To complicated things even further, Ada is a December birthday which means she misses the CPS cutoff enrollment date of September 1st, which will, when she finally starts school, mean that she will be one of the oldest kids in her class. I hear that's a benefit for her if she goes on to play sports since she'll be one of the more developed kids than her younger counterparts and can go on to greatness -- which is assumed already since it's really likely she'll be 6 feet tall and her aunt Heather played volleyball for Cornell. (Can you say "scholarship"?) Not that I'm going to be all pushy sports mom, but I surely won't discourage any glimmer of interest in sports from my child. And don't act all shocked when you see basketballs, volleyballs, and soccer balls on her Christmas list either.
Moral of the story: Having kids means having a lot of homework and hours of research. Don't think that just because you have a degree in this, that or something else that you automatically qualify to be a good parent. It's a full-time gig and you really can't skip classes.
This issue got stirred up the other day when my neighborhood mom friend Sara came over with her son Aaron for a mini half-hour playdate. She's on sabbatical from work for 6 weeks and needs to figure out what to do with Aaron now that her husband switched jobs and doesn't work from home anymore. This translates into them needing coverage for 45 hours instead of 25 or 30 since he could be more flexible, which kind of prices them out of the market for a nanny. She started researching Preschools to see what options she has.
Aaron, like Ada, is almost 2 now which seems to complicate things a bit more. I never really gave thought to the issue of the cost of child care for an infant versus a toddler. Sara enlightened me that it is WAY cheaper to have child care for a toddler since they are easier to take care of and a facility can handle more toddlers per adult. For an infant, it's expensive and a nanny can be a comparable option. Having family down the street or friends that are willing to volunteer their time is another awesome option. Who knew that taking care of a child can strangle a family's finances?
Whenever I bring up how much I've paid nannies in the past or for Ada's stint in daycare, my friend in Iowa, who runs a home daycare, is so shocked that she offers to drive three hours to my house everyday to take care of Ada. Turns out that I've paid three or four times what she charges in her small town. That's the cost of living adjustment when you are in the city I guess. Maybe it's just our part of town and the daycares know they can get the wealthy folks to pony up the big bucks. I don't consider myself "wealthy folk" and am therefore, constantly re-evaluating our options.
Since Sara stopped by and started this conversation, I got all jittery again because, as always happens, my friend who is watching Ada for us now, is pregnant and due early March. She already has a 2-year-old little boy and we have to discuss options going forward now that she'll have an infant on her hands too. If she is willing to keep watching Ada, that's great... but is that the best thing for Ada and for our family budget? And what happens when we have another child? Then what the heck do we do? I don't want to pay for a nanny and a preschool as that would really break the momma's piggy bank. Oh the stress involved is just so overwhelming sometimes. I can't emphasize enough how thankful I am to a friend that told me from the beginning, "Just try to worry about childcare six months at a time. Beyond that, you have no control and need to keep your options open." It's some of the best, and most honest, advice I've received.
Then there is the whole issue of preschool. As far as I can tell, there are preschools that are also daycares and the words are interchangeable. And the Chicago Public School system has preschools available to four-year-olds, and three-year-olds get put on an waiting list to be admitted if they have room. Those are only while the school year is in session I think. And they are still a paid program, but maybe at a reduced level? Clearly I have a ton of research to do on all of this stuff.
To complicated things even further, Ada is a December birthday which means she misses the CPS cutoff enrollment date of September 1st, which will, when she finally starts school, mean that she will be one of the oldest kids in her class. I hear that's a benefit for her if she goes on to play sports since she'll be one of the more developed kids than her younger counterparts and can go on to greatness -- which is assumed already since it's really likely she'll be 6 feet tall and her aunt Heather played volleyball for Cornell. (Can you say "scholarship"?) Not that I'm going to be all pushy sports mom, but I surely won't discourage any glimmer of interest in sports from my child. And don't act all shocked when you see basketballs, volleyballs, and soccer balls on her Christmas list either.
Moral of the story: Having kids means having a lot of homework and hours of research. Don't think that just because you have a degree in this, that or something else that you automatically qualify to be a good parent. It's a full-time gig and you really can't skip classes.
Monday, October 12, 2009
Be Considerate of Caregivers
Obviously, in the short time that Ada's been around, we've had more than our share of caregivers to help us take care of her. We've always tried to guarantee our nannies and babysitters a set amount of hours each week, or at least a minimum amount of money each week, to help make their job a bit more secure and worth while. Being that we've only needed them three days a week, that was our way of saying "Thanks for being willing to help us out part-time and being flexible with our schedule." The idea was great, I thought. If Ada was sick, or they were sick, or we had to shift a day this week to next week, we tried to keep the same amount going to them each week, with any extra added on that week as well. I understand what it is to be young and broke and counting on a paycheck to pay your bills. But... this last nanny we had really seemed to mess it all up. Yeah, it didn't work the best for us in the end when our nannies decided to move back home or go to graduate school or get a full-time job because we'd always be stuck with a few un-used hours that we had paid for but never redeemed. That was just part of the deal and a price I was willing to pay for the convenience of our arrangement. But the painful part was having to carry over hours needed from one week to the next and trying to make sure we were close enough to even in the end to call it fair.
This time, we tried something new. Try for 29 hours a week but if something comes up or changes, tough cookies. This is a great arrangement for us, but not so great for our sitter. The first week, things were normal. The second week, Ada didn't wake up until 9 or 9:30 each day which cut into our sitter's overall amount of time she had Ada. But it didn't cut into my time I was able to work since I can work from home when Ada sleeps. It was great. I saved six hours that week. A similar thing happened the next week and finally our friend wised up and said something. And I'm so glad she did. I was so caught up in the excitement of getting work done, having Ada get a lot of sleep, and having to pay less each week for our sitter that I failed to put myself in her shoes long enough to realize that all this meant she still had to be ready at 8 am but didn't start until 10 and didn't get paid for those 2 ready hours. My bad.
The good news is that she brought it up. I realized the error of my ways and arranged to have a more flexible situation whereas if Ada sleeps in, we just shift our schedule a bit later since that still works with her schedule and mine.
On top of all that, our sitter is also our friend socially. That complicates things by blurring the lines of what is done as our sitter and what is done in friendship. To solve that issue, we just made a declaration that whenever she watches Ada while I'm at work is considered sitter time and anything else is friend time. We'll watch Will and swap kids back and forth as needed for date-night and whatnot. That way, neither of us feels weird about it and it's a win-win for us both.
Moral of the story: Put yourself in your caregivers shoes and be open with them about concerns or issues. Good caregivers are hard to find but can be easy to keep happy if you keep lines of communication open.
This time, we tried something new. Try for 29 hours a week but if something comes up or changes, tough cookies. This is a great arrangement for us, but not so great for our sitter. The first week, things were normal. The second week, Ada didn't wake up until 9 or 9:30 each day which cut into our sitter's overall amount of time she had Ada. But it didn't cut into my time I was able to work since I can work from home when Ada sleeps. It was great. I saved six hours that week. A similar thing happened the next week and finally our friend wised up and said something. And I'm so glad she did. I was so caught up in the excitement of getting work done, having Ada get a lot of sleep, and having to pay less each week for our sitter that I failed to put myself in her shoes long enough to realize that all this meant she still had to be ready at 8 am but didn't start until 10 and didn't get paid for those 2 ready hours. My bad.
The good news is that she brought it up. I realized the error of my ways and arranged to have a more flexible situation whereas if Ada sleeps in, we just shift our schedule a bit later since that still works with her schedule and mine.
On top of all that, our sitter is also our friend socially. That complicates things by blurring the lines of what is done as our sitter and what is done in friendship. To solve that issue, we just made a declaration that whenever she watches Ada while I'm at work is considered sitter time and anything else is friend time. We'll watch Will and swap kids back and forth as needed for date-night and whatnot. That way, neither of us feels weird about it and it's a win-win for us both.
Moral of the story: Put yourself in your caregivers shoes and be open with them about concerns or issues. Good caregivers are hard to find but can be easy to keep happy if you keep lines of communication open.
Friday, September 11, 2009
Noooo...Don't Leave Me!!!!
Leaving Ada to go to work gets harder as she gets older. As a baby at daycare, yeah, she cried. At that age there is a lot of crying so it is less effective at pulling every heart string that I have. I admit I wasn't very emotional on the first day of daycare. I do remember walking away from dropping her off and feeling like I should be having the freak out moment I expect moms to have, but I didn't.
Now...well, she has just started this thing where she clings on to me in a vise-like bear hug for a few seconds when I drop her off. She didn't do it the first two weeks but I think this week, she wised up suddenly. And it could be so much worse. I'm only getting a short crying wail as Alison guides her into the vestibule. Typically followed by a text message saying all is well by the time they get upstairs and start to play.
On the other hand... last week when I would pick Ada up from her days with Will, she didn't want to walk home. I'd coax her into walking the whole three blocks so that we didn't get into a habit of me carrying her all the time since I'm not dealing with a stroller each morning. It was going just great until we got to our house and had two days of extraordinary tantrums, literally on the threshold of our building entrance. And the biggest tantrums I've ever seen Ada throw -- which is significant but still much less dramatic than most kids her age. They start with her dropping to the ground, laying on her belly, pounding her fits and kicking her feet into the floor (gently in Ada's case), and screaming hysterically until her breathing becomes irregular and I finally give in and rescue her from the most horrible moment of her life thus far. Of course, the door is wide open and no less than ten neighbors have walked or driven by to witness the spectacle and grin along with me. It's kind of funny, but not. And I'd never tell her that.
According to Colette and the half-dozen books she's read on how to be a good mom (she is my version of Cliff's Notes) she suggests I crouch down to Ada's level, acknowledge her feelings and the situation, and offer support. At least I think that's what she suggested. It seems to work and she's a pretty mellow kid so after two days of tantrums in the doorway, she was done. Hopefully, next week she'll forget about the whole strategy of clinging to mommy before her days playing with Will. At least I know that Alison is taking good care of her, she's learning new things, she comes back in a great mood, and she's safe. That peace of mind is priceless. Kudo's to Alison for making her happy (and me happy too!)
Moral of the story: It's okay to let go of your children. It's okay for them to throw an occassional tantrum and have a dramatic parting of ways when you leave. Just be strong, help guide them through it and hope that it's only temporary.
Now...well, she has just started this thing where she clings on to me in a vise-like bear hug for a few seconds when I drop her off. She didn't do it the first two weeks but I think this week, she wised up suddenly. And it could be so much worse. I'm only getting a short crying wail as Alison guides her into the vestibule. Typically followed by a text message saying all is well by the time they get upstairs and start to play.
On the other hand... last week when I would pick Ada up from her days with Will, she didn't want to walk home. I'd coax her into walking the whole three blocks so that we didn't get into a habit of me carrying her all the time since I'm not dealing with a stroller each morning. It was going just great until we got to our house and had two days of extraordinary tantrums, literally on the threshold of our building entrance. And the biggest tantrums I've ever seen Ada throw -- which is significant but still much less dramatic than most kids her age. They start with her dropping to the ground, laying on her belly, pounding her fits and kicking her feet into the floor (gently in Ada's case), and screaming hysterically until her breathing becomes irregular and I finally give in and rescue her from the most horrible moment of her life thus far. Of course, the door is wide open and no less than ten neighbors have walked or driven by to witness the spectacle and grin along with me. It's kind of funny, but not. And I'd never tell her that.
According to Colette and the half-dozen books she's read on how to be a good mom (she is my version of Cliff's Notes) she suggests I crouch down to Ada's level, acknowledge her feelings and the situation, and offer support. At least I think that's what she suggested. It seems to work and she's a pretty mellow kid so after two days of tantrums in the doorway, she was done. Hopefully, next week she'll forget about the whole strategy of clinging to mommy before her days playing with Will. At least I know that Alison is taking good care of her, she's learning new things, she comes back in a great mood, and she's safe. That peace of mind is priceless. Kudo's to Alison for making her happy (and me happy too!)
Moral of the story: It's okay to let go of your children. It's okay for them to throw an occassional tantrum and have a dramatic parting of ways when you leave. Just be strong, help guide them through it and hope that it's only temporary.
Friday, August 7, 2009
Naps, oh naps...
I've been pretty annoyed over the past few weeks with our most recent nanny. Not that she's doing a bad job or anything like that, no. It's because Ada keeps taking three or four hour naps on days that the nanny is here and only one or two-hour naps when I'm here.That could mean a few things...
1. I'm way cooler than the nanny and Ada wants to spend more time with me so she uses Nanny days to catch up on her sleep. (doubtful)
2. The nanny has been drugging her or denying her any sugar or caffeine. (no chance)
3. The nanny stays in the back of the house and doesn't walk near Ada's door, thereby preventing the floor from creaking and waking her up. (maybe, getting warmer)
4. The nanny is more entertaining than I am and Ada needs more sleep to recuperate from all the fun they have together. (likely.
No matter what it means, it really ticks me off because I'm paying someone to hang out in my house for three or four hours (out of nine) and my child isn't even awake. And it's not like she's scrubbing my bathroom. She might fold Ada's laundry or empty out the dishwasher but that's all I'm getting for my $12/hour. Doesn't really seem like the best deal to me. At least if I'm home, I can get in a few hours of work and catch up on my blogging or do something crafty and feel productive.
Thankfully, the nanny is done and Ada has taken two LONG naps while I've been here this week which makes me uber happy and even more productive. LOVE IT. (It helps that I asked the nanny her secret and she said she just tires Ada out in the morning by going to the park and playing until she can't play anymore. Works like a charm.)
Moral of the story: Give them all you've got in the morning and they'll give you a break in the afternoon (hopefully).
1. I'm way cooler than the nanny and Ada wants to spend more time with me so she uses Nanny days to catch up on her sleep. (doubtful)
2. The nanny has been drugging her or denying her any sugar or caffeine. (no chance)
3. The nanny stays in the back of the house and doesn't walk near Ada's door, thereby preventing the floor from creaking and waking her up. (maybe, getting warmer)
4. The nanny is more entertaining than I am and Ada needs more sleep to recuperate from all the fun they have together. (likely.
No matter what it means, it really ticks me off because I'm paying someone to hang out in my house for three or four hours (out of nine) and my child isn't even awake. And it's not like she's scrubbing my bathroom. She might fold Ada's laundry or empty out the dishwasher but that's all I'm getting for my $12/hour. Doesn't really seem like the best deal to me. At least if I'm home, I can get in a few hours of work and catch up on my blogging or do something crafty and feel productive.
Thankfully, the nanny is done and Ada has taken two LONG naps while I've been here this week which makes me uber happy and even more productive. LOVE IT. (It helps that I asked the nanny her secret and she said she just tires Ada out in the morning by going to the park and playing until she can't play anymore. Works like a charm.)
Moral of the story: Give them all you've got in the morning and they'll give you a break in the afternoon (hopefully).
Nanny update #623
Believe it or not, we've eaten up yet another nanny. Courtney has gone back to grad school full time and now Ada's off to spend her three days a week with a friend of ours who lives just around the corner and down the street.
I will say that I learn a lot from each nanny we have. Be it that I am more or less picky than I think, that I really do want them to try to keep the place neat, that I am more of a neat freak than I think and can't stand having sand on the floor, that I hate it when they leave all the lights on, that I abhor it when they use a million paper towels a day, etc. etc. etc.
I'm not really looking forward to having to take Ada somewhere else, but I am hoping that she gets along with our friend's son who is about 3 months older, and that she learns to talk more since she's around him. We'll see. I'm also excited about having less diapers to do, less food to buy, and less messes to clean up since our friend will be handling all of that at her house instead of mine. Yahooey!
We'll see how it goes. Wish us all luck with the transition.
I will say that I learn a lot from each nanny we have. Be it that I am more or less picky than I think, that I really do want them to try to keep the place neat, that I am more of a neat freak than I think and can't stand having sand on the floor, that I hate it when they leave all the lights on, that I abhor it when they use a million paper towels a day, etc. etc. etc.
I'm not really looking forward to having to take Ada somewhere else, but I am hoping that she gets along with our friend's son who is about 3 months older, and that she learns to talk more since she's around him. We'll see. I'm also excited about having less diapers to do, less food to buy, and less messes to clean up since our friend will be handling all of that at her house instead of mine. Yahooey!
We'll see how it goes. Wish us all luck with the transition.
Wednesday, May 20, 2009
New Nanny take 26!
Got the new nanny yesterday. Like her a lot. She missed the bus this morning and was five minutes late but called me early to let me know and was super apologetic. That's cool with me. We've all been there.
Ada seems to like her. The little thing keeps falling asleep earlier than her scheduled nap -- like while on the swing at the park or while eating lunch -- and my theory is that she's having too much fun with the nanny to stay awake. This nanny is super intense and all about Ada whereas I'm a bit more laid back (read: busy) and don't play with her as much. But so far so good. And I've already passed her name around to all of our nanny friends so that she can pick up extra hours here and there to help us moms out.
It's kinda weird knowing that I only have her until mid August and then we switch things up again. I think I'll be more tolerant of little stuff if that's the case. And my co-worker's wife is looking for a preschool for her 3 year old and that got me wondering, when do I need to put Ada in daycare or preschool? I think she'd be more open to it now but she's also so clingy this past few weeks that it might not be as fun as it sounds. And finding somewhere 3 days a week that is flexible... ug. Not exciting.
Moral of the story: Just keep going with the flow. Eventually you'll end up somewhere.
Ada seems to like her. The little thing keeps falling asleep earlier than her scheduled nap -- like while on the swing at the park or while eating lunch -- and my theory is that she's having too much fun with the nanny to stay awake. This nanny is super intense and all about Ada whereas I'm a bit more laid back (read: busy) and don't play with her as much. But so far so good. And I've already passed her name around to all of our nanny friends so that she can pick up extra hours here and there to help us moms out.
It's kinda weird knowing that I only have her until mid August and then we switch things up again. I think I'll be more tolerant of little stuff if that's the case. And my co-worker's wife is looking for a preschool for her 3 year old and that got me wondering, when do I need to put Ada in daycare or preschool? I think she'd be more open to it now but she's also so clingy this past few weeks that it might not be as fun as it sounds. And finding somewhere 3 days a week that is flexible... ug. Not exciting.
Moral of the story: Just keep going with the flow. Eventually you'll end up somewhere.
Saturday, May 2, 2009
Nanny Secured
I've been too busy reading the Twilight series in a matter of a week and watching the movie 4 times to possibly have time to post anything exciting in our lives. My bad. Sorry.
In the past week or so, we hired a nanny --Courtney. She seems super nice and good with Ada and I think she'll be a great fit for us this summer. So that's fun and exciting.
It just hit me today, with 2 weeks left, that Ashley is leaving. It's weird having a nanny for a long time and then switching it up. She's been a really good fit for us. Luckily, she got a full-time nanny gig here in the city so she'll still be able to babysit Ada. That's always nice.
And Ashely just learned where the plunger was yesterday, darn it. Takes so long to get a nanny trained and up to speed. (It was a minor toilet clog and she fixed it just fine.)
Next week, Ada is giving Ashley 2 days off to go chillax with her aunt Heather and grandma Ba. Heather is flying in for the Mom's day weekend. That means I get two days off too! Yippee!
Lame update. I know. What more is there to say? Change sucks but that's life. Hopefully Ada adjusts better than I do.
Here's a photo just for fun....JPG)
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Monday, April 20, 2009
Summer Nanny Search
This past Saturday, the search for a summer nanny began. I posted an ad on Sittercity.com and within an hour, my cell phone started ringing. I got 5 messages over the weekend from people who are interested. Mind you, I don't pay well, it's 3 days a week, and it's only from May 15 until August.
I went online to my sittercity account today to check and see who applied. I thought I had 14 applications and thought that was good. Then I clicked onto the Next Page button and realized that I had 14 PAGES of applications, at 10 applications a page, that is 140 people who have applied. I contacted 6 of them -- one because she called, has my same bday and goes to the University of Iowa like I did.
So now we are setting up interviews. Unfortunately, a few of the girls are students and can't come home for an interview until May 10th. That's cutting it a bit close and how can they compete when I have 140 options and many of them can come in for an interview? And do I have them come all the way back for a weekend just to interview for this position? Really?
I'm going to start with the 3 or 4 I have already set up. I'll interview my current nanny's friend --Dave -- Ada might like a manny. And if I don't click with any of those women, then I'll do phone interviews with the 2 at school.
The other bummer about interviewing so many people is the amount of time it takes. We have to prep questions, schedule them, keep track of who's coming, when. And it will eat up a bit of our Saturday. That's a small price to pay to find someone to watch our daughter I guess. And I'm glad to see that we have so many applicants. I think in the future, I'll be more blunt in my posting and say the start date is non-negotiable, the pay is non-negotiable, and you must be available to interview this week or Saturday. Some people are applying just to apply and can't start until June. That isn't helping.
Wish us luck!
I went online to my sittercity account today to check and see who applied. I thought I had 14 applications and thought that was good. Then I clicked onto the Next Page button and realized that I had 14 PAGES of applications, at 10 applications a page, that is 140 people who have applied. I contacted 6 of them -- one because she called, has my same bday and goes to the University of Iowa like I did.
So now we are setting up interviews. Unfortunately, a few of the girls are students and can't come home for an interview until May 10th. That's cutting it a bit close and how can they compete when I have 140 options and many of them can come in for an interview? And do I have them come all the way back for a weekend just to interview for this position? Really?
I'm going to start with the 3 or 4 I have already set up. I'll interview my current nanny's friend --Dave -- Ada might like a manny. And if I don't click with any of those women, then I'll do phone interviews with the 2 at school.
The other bummer about interviewing so many people is the amount of time it takes. We have to prep questions, schedule them, keep track of who's coming, when. And it will eat up a bit of our Saturday. That's a small price to pay to find someone to watch our daughter I guess. And I'm glad to see that we have so many applicants. I think in the future, I'll be more blunt in my posting and say the start date is non-negotiable, the pay is non-negotiable, and you must be available to interview this week or Saturday. Some people are applying just to apply and can't start until June. That isn't helping.
Wish us luck!
Thursday, March 5, 2009
Now Hiring - Take 5
When everything seems to be going along so well...
BAM!
My nanny is moving back home to live with her parents.
But not until May. At least I've got some time to replace her.
And my frustrations continue.
I just got done telling my friend that no matter how hard you try, you just can't plan to have a nanny for more than 6 months. It just doesn't work out that way. If the nanny candidate jumps around a lot, that's fine. Don't worry about it. Just roll with it and enjoy him/her while you can.
There was daycare - where she got kicked out, Ashley 1 (two days a week) and Emily (one day a week for about 3 weeks), then my friend Jessi and my mom filled in when she went to Hawaii for a month, then Gosha (she lasted half a day and taught me that a native English speaker was #1 on my list of qualities), Stacy (a month and a half before her back wasn't going to be able to lift our chunky monkey), and Ashley 2 who's been with us for quite some time now - September maybe? At least the streak is getting a bit longer.
Bummer. I really like Ashley too.
Well, we'll enjoy then next month or so and start the process over again. Who knows what the world will bring but I'm excited to continue riding the wave. :)
Moral of the story: Consider yourself warned. Childcare isn't easy and you just have to roll with the punches. Hold on and enjoy the ride.
BAM!
My nanny is moving back home to live with her parents.
But not until May. At least I've got some time to replace her.
And my frustrations continue.
I just got done telling my friend that no matter how hard you try, you just can't plan to have a nanny for more than 6 months. It just doesn't work out that way. If the nanny candidate jumps around a lot, that's fine. Don't worry about it. Just roll with it and enjoy him/her while you can.
There was daycare - where she got kicked out, Ashley 1 (two days a week) and Emily (one day a week for about 3 weeks), then my friend Jessi and my mom filled in when she went to Hawaii for a month, then Gosha (she lasted half a day and taught me that a native English speaker was #1 on my list of qualities), Stacy (a month and a half before her back wasn't going to be able to lift our chunky monkey), and Ashley 2 who's been with us for quite some time now - September maybe? At least the streak is getting a bit longer.
Bummer. I really like Ashley too.
Well, we'll enjoy then next month or so and start the process over again. Who knows what the world will bring but I'm excited to continue riding the wave. :)
Moral of the story: Consider yourself warned. Childcare isn't easy and you just have to roll with the punches. Hold on and enjoy the ride.
Wednesday, September 17, 2008
Nanny day two
Yesterday went super duper well for the new nanny Ashley and she had an easy day with Ada -- minus the cloth diapers and the fact that Ada pooped 3 times in the morning to the point where Ashley gave up and decided to try the cloth diapers again another day. She did however note that Ada was the "happiest baby I've ever seen" when she first got here in the morning as Ada was playing and smiling and being silly, as per usual. Ashley even got her to take 2 one-hour naps and managed to get the stroller in and out of the inner and outer vestibule doors, without locking herself out. Something I consider to be a miracle.
I was both comforted and a bit peeved when I went to hug Ada good by in the morning and she quickly turned back to Ashley and reached out for the pass off. She's been doing this a lot lately. She must be secure in our relationship or bored with me (more likely) since she tends to reach out to go to other people when I'm holding her. I'm proud of that fact since most babies nuzzle in to mom's shoulder and act shy. Not my Ada. You want her, you got her. Here she comes! She even plays the same game between Rick and I and we play pass the baby, back and forth, back and forth.
Today however wasn't so easy. Ada has been and continues to teethe. I warned Ashley before I left and listed off the twelve steps we take to make her happier when her teeth hurt. "When all else fails, go outside and she'll quiet down."were my parting words of wisdom. I was shocked to hear upon my return, at 5 pm not 6, that Ada was a fussy little mess all day. Ashley had to resort to drugs twice and got the pleasure of listening to my little fuss pot all day go on and on about her teeth. Ada even whined while outside in her stroller on a walk -- very rare for this kid. Talk about making your mom into a liar on day two. And the result--still no teeth. Someday, sometime, hopefully in the immediate near future, I'll be able to post a photo of this damn elusive tooth and my very own shit grin as it will be one of the most glorious days of my life, and Rick's and Ada's too I'm sure.
Moral of the story: Don't make promises when it comes to the behavior of a nine month old. She'll sell you out and prove you wrong every time.
I was both comforted and a bit peeved when I went to hug Ada good by in the morning and she quickly turned back to Ashley and reached out for the pass off. She's been doing this a lot lately. She must be secure in our relationship or bored with me (more likely) since she tends to reach out to go to other people when I'm holding her. I'm proud of that fact since most babies nuzzle in to mom's shoulder and act shy. Not my Ada. You want her, you got her. Here she comes! She even plays the same game between Rick and I and we play pass the baby, back and forth, back and forth.
Today however wasn't so easy. Ada has been and continues to teethe. I warned Ashley before I left and listed off the twelve steps we take to make her happier when her teeth hurt. "When all else fails, go outside and she'll quiet down."were my parting words of wisdom. I was shocked to hear upon my return, at 5 pm not 6, that Ada was a fussy little mess all day. Ashley had to resort to drugs twice and got the pleasure of listening to my little fuss pot all day go on and on about her teeth. Ada even whined while outside in her stroller on a walk -- very rare for this kid. Talk about making your mom into a liar on day two. And the result--still no teeth. Someday, sometime, hopefully in the immediate near future, I'll be able to post a photo of this damn elusive tooth and my very own shit grin as it will be one of the most glorious days of my life, and Rick's and Ada's too I'm sure.
Moral of the story: Don't make promises when it comes to the behavior of a nine month old. She'll sell you out and prove you wrong every time.
Monday, September 8, 2008
Sleep baby...
This past weekend was a bit weird for our family when it comes to getting much needed sleep. Ada decided she wasn't going to take naps as she normally does, and that threw us all off. We also crammed a lot into one weekend - cards and dinner with friends, nanny interviews, lunch with more friends, lunch with family and a two hour drive on each end of it, brunch with other friends, a long walk including shoe shopping, some yoga and even a bit of the bears game on our snow covered TV with crummy rabbit ear reception. Whew! I guess that's a lot of eating - and amazingly we missed dinner Saturday night as we both crashed at 7 pm for a "nap" that took us until 5 am. Hmmmm...
Part of the reason for the lack of schedule is Ada teething, and the other theory I have is that she really wants to take one big nap nowadays instead of two. I'm not seeing how this is going to work out but we'll see. She was pretty good on Friday as far as naps go, but Saturday she skipped the afternoon nap to meet the nanny candidates -- we interviewed two and liked them both. Hopefully we'll secure one of them today. Woohoo. But boy is that a reason for me to lack sleep. Anyone who thinks finding a nanny isn't stressful is nuts --So after Ada fussed the four times we tried to get her to take a nap, I finally broke down and that's when we headed out for a 2 hour walk. She napped for 20 minutes. It turns out she isn't much of a stroller napper. Then she slept well overnight, but was up at 5 am. After drinking and playing in our bed for a bit, Rick finally got her back into bed at 7:30 am for an hour and a half nap.
She enjoyed a celebratory brunch with friends who got engaged oh about 8 months ago... and really loved sucking on and biting the spoon. When one dropped, she was lucky to have it quickly substituted with another as there were 10 of us at the table and plenty of clean spoons to go around. Then for the drive out west 2 hours, we had to first refill her tank with milk and do the ever so fun diaper change in the front seat of our tiny civic with her on my lap and daddy doing the quick change. On the road to Oregon, IL, we didn't sleep at all and finally had a major breakdown 15 minutes from our destination. We stopped for a quick feeding that turned into a 15 minute glug fest and was fought with much screaming when it was time to get back into the car seat. Since Mom's bag of tricks was empty, the remainder of the trip was less than pleasant. Upon arriving, the baby was fussy, mommy was crabby, daddy was glad to have a big beer, and after feeding, changing, rocking, and cuddling, the baby finally took a 45 minute nap.
As the sun started dropping on the horizon, we loaded up for the ride home. And to those people who think you just stick a baby in the car and poof they pass out--liars! My kid doesn't like to sleep in the car. At most she'll give us a half hour stint but in the four hours we were driving this weekend, she didn't give us 5 minutes. Frustrating.
And speaking of the little angel, it's 9 am on Monday and she is finally deciding she should maybe get up. She didn't go down until 8 pm last night but that was the last we heard of her. 13 hours ago! Yep, we have a real sleeper. Thank goodness.
Moral of the story: Cross your fingers for a good sleeper if you plan to have kids, and do everything you can to help make their sleep schedule work. You'll have a much happier baby in the long run.
Part of the reason for the lack of schedule is Ada teething, and the other theory I have is that she really wants to take one big nap nowadays instead of two. I'm not seeing how this is going to work out but we'll see. She was pretty good on Friday as far as naps go, but Saturday she skipped the afternoon nap to meet the nanny candidates -- we interviewed two and liked them both. Hopefully we'll secure one of them today. Woohoo. But boy is that a reason for me to lack sleep. Anyone who thinks finding a nanny isn't stressful is nuts --So after Ada fussed the four times we tried to get her to take a nap, I finally broke down and that's when we headed out for a 2 hour walk. She napped for 20 minutes. It turns out she isn't much of a stroller napper. Then she slept well overnight, but was up at 5 am. After drinking and playing in our bed for a bit, Rick finally got her back into bed at 7:30 am for an hour and a half nap.
She enjoyed a celebratory brunch with friends who got engaged oh about 8 months ago... and really loved sucking on and biting the spoon. When one dropped, she was lucky to have it quickly substituted with another as there were 10 of us at the table and plenty of clean spoons to go around. Then for the drive out west 2 hours, we had to first refill her tank with milk and do the ever so fun diaper change in the front seat of our tiny civic with her on my lap and daddy doing the quick change. On the road to Oregon, IL, we didn't sleep at all and finally had a major breakdown 15 minutes from our destination. We stopped for a quick feeding that turned into a 15 minute glug fest and was fought with much screaming when it was time to get back into the car seat. Since Mom's bag of tricks was empty, the remainder of the trip was less than pleasant. Upon arriving, the baby was fussy, mommy was crabby, daddy was glad to have a big beer, and after feeding, changing, rocking, and cuddling, the baby finally took a 45 minute nap.
As the sun started dropping on the horizon, we loaded up for the ride home. And to those people who think you just stick a baby in the car and poof they pass out--liars! My kid doesn't like to sleep in the car. At most she'll give us a half hour stint but in the four hours we were driving this weekend, she didn't give us 5 minutes. Frustrating.
And speaking of the little angel, it's 9 am on Monday and she is finally deciding she should maybe get up. She didn't go down until 8 pm last night but that was the last we heard of her. 13 hours ago! Yep, we have a real sleeper. Thank goodness.
Moral of the story: Cross your fingers for a good sleeper if you plan to have kids, and do everything you can to help make their sleep schedule work. You'll have a much happier baby in the long run.
Wednesday, September 3, 2008
Daycare Nanny Drama Part XXIV
As I've finally learned, this whole nanny/daycare drama b.s. is almost never ending. At least until Ada is old enough to stay home by herself anyway. My mom's words of encouragement most recently were "The best days of my life were not having to buy diapers for you and your brother, and the day I didn't have to find another sitter to watch you guys." So true. Only 8 months into Ada's little life and I completely understand.
Here's the latest.
We hired a sitter. She came for a trial day. She called at noon to say she couldn't get Ada to sleep. I gave her a few things to try. She called again at 1:45 to say still no nap- Ada should have been down twice that day and she had already had a dose of Motrin for her teeth so the fact that she wasn't napping was a bit crazy. I was home by 2 and the sitter was done. Ada was really happy to see me. She just didn't like the woman at all. I get that. We can't all get along all the time.
Following my gut, I had a backup sitter waiting in the wings. She came and is currently watching Ada until we can go back through the process and find a more permanent solution. This current woman has a bad back, needs time of for this, that, and something else, and really just doesn't know what she wants to do in life since she got laid off a few months back and is just trying to figure things out. She's not serious about being a nanny and it shows. But Ada seems to like her okay and it's a good finger in the damn for a few weeks.
So, yep, we're back to the drawing board. Luckily I joined Sittercity.com a few weeks back and this will be my third time posting this position online. I received two good applications right after posting the opportunity so that's encouraging. But Rick will be doing the interviews and I'll be taking the support role as I just get too emotionally attached to these people and want to help everyone out. It's tough.
My new list of advice is as follows: Make your husband deal with it. All of it.
Moral of the story: The drama won't end, so you just have to learn to accept it and deal with it as best you can. Try to go with the flow and always trust your gut. It will all work out in the end so just have a little faith.
Here's the latest.
We hired a sitter. She came for a trial day. She called at noon to say she couldn't get Ada to sleep. I gave her a few things to try. She called again at 1:45 to say still no nap- Ada should have been down twice that day and she had already had a dose of Motrin for her teeth so the fact that she wasn't napping was a bit crazy. I was home by 2 and the sitter was done. Ada was really happy to see me. She just didn't like the woman at all. I get that. We can't all get along all the time.
Following my gut, I had a backup sitter waiting in the wings. She came and is currently watching Ada until we can go back through the process and find a more permanent solution. This current woman has a bad back, needs time of for this, that, and something else, and really just doesn't know what she wants to do in life since she got laid off a few months back and is just trying to figure things out. She's not serious about being a nanny and it shows. But Ada seems to like her okay and it's a good finger in the damn for a few weeks.
So, yep, we're back to the drawing board. Luckily I joined Sittercity.com a few weeks back and this will be my third time posting this position online. I received two good applications right after posting the opportunity so that's encouraging. But Rick will be doing the interviews and I'll be taking the support role as I just get too emotionally attached to these people and want to help everyone out. It's tough.
My new list of advice is as follows: Make your husband deal with it. All of it.
Moral of the story: The drama won't end, so you just have to learn to accept it and deal with it as best you can. Try to go with the flow and always trust your gut. It will all work out in the end so just have a little faith.
Tuesday, July 22, 2008
Childcare Update
Okay, so I don't even know what to call the people who watch Ada. Right now it is a "babysitter" because I think "nanny" is more of a professional who does this for a living whereas babysitter is more temporary. Either way, whoever is taking care of my child is only temporary as I found out last week that sitter #2 who comes on Thursday is no longer available, and sitter #1 who comes on Tuesdays and Wednesdays is done as of September 10th when her semester starts back up. So here I am, still juggling the sitter crap. Which again makes me really thankful for my boss and my job and how flexible things are in my life right now because I couldn't do it without that... and I get by with a little help from my friends. Sorry, couldn't resist. :) But really, I do. I have friends that are willing to cover for me in a bind and that is really helpful since grandmas Ba and DD are over an hour away.
So what am I on? Plan F at this point? Daycare didn't work, hodge podge grandma coverage was temporary, the nanny interviews failed, sitter one will be okay for a bit, sitter two is done, sitter three comes Friday, so I guess this is Plan G since I know sitter three is temporary because I'm trying to help her find a job in Human Rights here in Chicago - Anyone know of anyone looking for a new grad wanting to get into Human Rights work or general administration work at a University??? I'm thinking these younger "sitters" aren't taking this as seriously as I'd hoped, which is to be expected since they are "sitters" and not "nannies". At least they are giving me notice instead of dropping the ball completely.
From my experience so far, I'd have to say maturity goes far when dealing with infants. And if I were a nanny/baby sitter, I'd only take jobs where the kids are one year or older and aren't sick. It wouldn't be worth it for me to deal with an infant that screams all day because they are teething. I once babysat for a little girl, just a few months old, who had an ear infection and was asthmatic. Her parents had just adopted her and I was shocked that they would leave me with her when she wasn't feeling well. But they did. She screamed the whole time and her older sister kept saying "This isn't normal, you should call my parents." So I did. I called them about ten times during their movie and they were pissed. Then they went on to tell the other sitters how awful I was because I couldn't handle their baby. I vowed at that moment never to do that to a sitter. And I have a lot of guilt now that Ada is teething because I can't predict when she'll have a screaming fit and when she won't. But at least I leave them with 5 teething remedies and a fresh bottle of infant Motrin so that
And not only can I not get this daytime baby coverage all smooth and stressless, but I can't find a sitter for a saturday night this week. I'm going to have to try sittercity.com and let you know how that goes. We'll see.
I still can't complain as I have a friend in Colorado who is having a mess of a time with her sitters and has given up going out altogther until her regular sitter comes back from summer vacation. So it could be much much worse. And I'm lucky that I live in a city with great mom networks, great friends, and so much to do. Chicago rocks!
Moral of the story: Childcare is a neverending battle so you might as well look for the humor in it all, learn as you go and hope that your child is learning all of the good things and none of the bad from each person who cares for her.
So what am I on? Plan F at this point? Daycare didn't work, hodge podge grandma coverage was temporary, the nanny interviews failed, sitter one will be okay for a bit, sitter two is done, sitter three comes Friday, so I guess this is Plan G since I know sitter three is temporary because I'm trying to help her find a job in Human Rights here in Chicago - Anyone know of anyone looking for a new grad wanting to get into Human Rights work or general administration work at a University??? I'm thinking these younger "sitters" aren't taking this as seriously as I'd hoped, which is to be expected since they are "sitters" and not "nannies". At least they are giving me notice instead of dropping the ball completely.
From my experience so far, I'd have to say maturity goes far when dealing with infants. And if I were a nanny/baby sitter, I'd only take jobs where the kids are one year or older and aren't sick. It wouldn't be worth it for me to deal with an infant that screams all day because they are teething. I once babysat for a little girl, just a few months old, who had an ear infection and was asthmatic. Her parents had just adopted her and I was shocked that they would leave me with her when she wasn't feeling well. But they did. She screamed the whole time and her older sister kept saying "This isn't normal, you should call my parents." So I did. I called them about ten times during their movie and they were pissed. Then they went on to tell the other sitters how awful I was because I couldn't handle their baby. I vowed at that moment never to do that to a sitter. And I have a lot of guilt now that Ada is teething because I can't predict when she'll have a screaming fit and when she won't. But at least I leave them with 5 teething remedies and a fresh bottle of infant Motrin so that
And not only can I not get this daytime baby coverage all smooth and stressless, but I can't find a sitter for a saturday night this week. I'm going to have to try sittercity.com and let you know how that goes. We'll see.
I still can't complain as I have a friend in Colorado who is having a mess of a time with her sitters and has given up going out altogther until her regular sitter comes back from summer vacation. So it could be much much worse. And I'm lucky that I live in a city with great mom networks, great friends, and so much to do. Chicago rocks!
Moral of the story: Childcare is a neverending battle so you might as well look for the humor in it all, learn as you go and hope that your child is learning all of the good things and none of the bad from each person who cares for her.
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