My first birthday as a Mom is here. What a day filled with emotion. Some good, some bad. But overall, a day for reflection. Being a Monday, I didn't go in to work. Being the day after we threw a birthday BBQ at our house, I had a lot of work to do.
Pre-mommyhood, birthday parties were about going out to the clubs and getting crazy with friends -- or in our case, having our 30 closest friends come over for a crazy night in. It has typically been a day for me to get wild and free and be silly. This year however, I feel things have changed a bit. They didn't necessarily have to, but they did. Instead of a house party into the wee hours, I opted for a daytime BBQ and was in bed at 9. Instead of a small array of chocolate martinis, I had a few glasses of water... and several desserts. And instead of me being the subject of the photos, Ada took center stage. I don't think there are any photos of me at my birthday party. Granted, I also decided to do a shared birthday party with Ada since she'll be 6 months in about a week. (I'll have to blog on my belief that birthdays should not be overshadowed by holidays and I can set whatever traditions I want since the majority of Americans can't tell you why we celebrate most of the holidays we do... but I'll get to that.) So things changed a bit, but in a good way.
The party was a blast. It was great to see so many friends come out to celebrate. I ate some fabulous desserts and got to spend a little time with a lot of good friends. I think it was similar to a wedding or baby shower where there are so many people and you are the host, or just the one person everyone has in common, so everyone needs you to make decisions -- do we need more meat? do you want me to get more ice? should we put out more cupcakes? But it is a challenge to host your birthday party when you are busy playing mommy at the same time. I am blessed to have a child that doesn't mind strangers and can be held by many, and passed around pretty well, but I'm also still nursing so there were a few times during the party that I had to disappear into the nursery to try to get Ada to sleep. It's tough greeting your guests as they come in and leave when you're exposing your left boob. Maybe that would have made the party even more wild and crazy though-- I hadn't thought of that...
But that was yesterday. Not my actual birthday but the day before my birthday. And today, my actual birthday, I got to wake up to a messy house and a sizable list of mommy duties and chores. But I must say, it beats a day with a hangover hands down.
So in my reflections of turning a year older, I look back on 28 and have hopes for 29. I'm thankful for my girlfriends who took me to lunch and dinner today to celebrate in Rick's absence--he had to work late on my birthday. I'm thankful for my beautiful daughter whom I spent the entire day with and I must say, she took a nice morning nap, didn't fuss much, behaved well at lunch at a restaurant and while on errands, slept in the car and at Aunt Anne's house, ate well, and made a great doorstop as I managed the inner and outer vestibule doors today with the stroller and diaper bag-- venturing out twice. She pooped solid poops today since she started solids--happy birthday mom--and not once, but three times. And she didn't even give me grief about going to bed at 8:15 instead of her usual 6:30-7:30 window.
And, since it is my birthday, she even let me read my favorite stories to her before bed. How lucky am I?
Moral of the story: A lot of things change when you have a baby, but they aren't all bad. Sure you see friends globetrotting and spending lavishly on frivolous things, but I have a baby. And I wouldn't change that for the world. Her smile just before she went to bed tonight was worth every tough moment I've had these last 6 months, and I'd do it again in a heartbeat.
Monday, June 9, 2008
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